Overwhelmed by parenting advice for your child in the age of algorithms? Discover how to navigate the information overload and choose the right parenting model!
The tidal wave of parenting information
You're probably bombarded with advice on raising and caring for your children, whether it's from family, friends or online influencers and experts. It can become overwhelming and make it even more difficult, especially if you are a first-time parent. Tovah P. Klein, director of the Center for Child Development at Barnard College, admits that “the proliferation of advice, from experts to influencers, has made parenting more confusing. It is therefore crucial to filter this information to avoid overload and confusion.
Parenting models for all tastes
The diversity of information has allowed for experimentation with different parenting models. Among the most common are:
- Authoritarian parenting, characterized by inflexible and demanding parenting.
- Authoritative education, which combines support and affection while establishing limits, thus promoting the autonomy of children.
- Permissive parenting, without strict limits or control, which can lead to rebellious or aggressive children.
- Passive parenting, based on a model of absent fatherhood or motherhood, as harmful as permissiveness.
A more recent and respectful parenting model, called “soft” or “A. M. A. R.”, is an interesting alternative. It is based on the principles of attention, mentalization, self-regulation and regulation.
The A. M.A.R. model: an inclusive and caring approach
The A. M.A.R. model encourages parents to be coaches rather than authoritarian figures. Its four principles are:
- Attention: the ability to pay attention and connect emotionally with the child.
- Mentalization: understanding and empathizing with the child without criticism or judgment.
- Self-centeredness: recognizing one's role as a parent and accepting children's knowledge and skills, even if they exceed one's own.
- Regulation: providing a safe environment for children to learn to manage their emotions appropriately.
Learning to navigate the ocean of information.
To avoid feeling overwhelmed by parenting advice, it is essential to understand these different models and act accordingly. Keep in mind that each family and child is unique, and parenting can only be understood through practice.
It is important to be forgiving of yourself and not feel guilty if you feel you are not keeping up with other parents. Don't be afraid to ask for advice from an authority figure you respect who has played a key role in your own upbringing (such as a parent, grandparent, etc.). Don't take too seriously the long list of rules and recommendations posted on websites and social networks.
Ultimately, the key is to find the balance that works for your family and your personal situation. By being informed and listening to your children, you can navigate the age of algorithms and information overload with confidence and peace of mind.